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| Keeping a Leash On Our Emotions |
In the usual business situation, anger and irritation are much more
of a problem than love. True, you might occasionally let someone
you like get away with something you shouldn't. Most bosses,
however, are more apt to make wrong, unwise decisions in the heat
of anger or resentment.
Keeping a leash on our emotions is something we must do for
ourselves. No one else can do it for us.
Everybody gets exasperated once in a while. But if it happens
frequently or if you tend to nurse a grudge afterward it isn't
good. You've got a problem. Better check up on yourself.
No matter where you work, there will always be people whose faults
and personality defects can be annoying and irritating--if you let
yourself be annoyed and irritated. But supervisors and managers who
let their feelings get out of control in this manner hurt their
effectiveness. They limit their usefulness to the company and may
even block their own advancement.
You can't control other people sensibly until you first control
yourself. That's fundamental. So, whenever you start to get
irritated, STOP! Grab hold of yourself. Don't get mad. Get curious.
Remember, when people anger you, they aren't necessarily doing it
on purpose. To some extent, they may not be able to help acting the
way they do. We are all products of our past experiences. If you
had lived through what that person has lived through, you might be
just as irritating.
So why let yourself get angry? The minute you get angry, you lose.
The action you take is not going to be as smart or appropriate as
it would be if you kept your cool.
Whenever you feel yourself getting angry, try to stop the exchange
and postpone any discussion for the time being. When you've cooled
down a bit, put yourself in that person's shoes and see if you can
figure out what makes him or her tick. The more you realize why a
person acts in a certain way, the less it will irritate you. It
will make you a lot more tolerant, less touchy, and a lot more
effective in dealing with people.
-- Unknown |
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